Jane

Well, folks... Apparently blogging isn't really my thing. I'm not very consistent. Oh well. I make no promises for consistency in my blogging this year either. Today I'm just getting something off my chest.

My friend Jane died last month. On the 12th, to be exact. 9 days after she gave birth to her third baby, a precious boy whom she never met because she was put into a coma before he was born.

My heart broke that day. It broke for Chloe, who is old enough to understand that mommy will not be coming home, but not why. It broke for Tobiah, who will never meet his mom who loved him so much, even before his birth. It broke for Ava, who we recently learned has a malformed cerebellum and is developmentally behind in several areas, but is the sweetest little girl you may ever meet. And it broke for Trey who not only lost his high school sweetheart-- the love of his life, but has to raise these kids on his own. I can't even fathom what he's going through right now.

I don't understand why Jane died last month. I don't understand why she never got to meet Tobiah, or why she never got to see Ava walk by herself (which she can now do!). I don't understand so many things about Jane's death...

But here's what I do understand, what I cling to: My God is still sovereign. He is still faithful. He has not abandoned this family in this tragedy. Before he was born, Trey and Jane named their boy Tobiah, which means "God is good," and that is no coincidence. I pray that anytime Trey picks up his baby boy he'll remember that God is still good, even in this.

This song sums up my thoughts pretty well.

Keeping Score.

Jeff has been gone for a week today. One week.

I have accomplished nothing on my bucket list.

Netflix broke.
Cable broke.
Pool broke.
3 tornado warnings in the middle of the night.
AC broke.

If you're keeping score, here it is:

Deployment: 5

Stacy: 0

Next week, I get to win. Otherwise, I may just run away...

I Got Out Birth Storied Today...

I know what you're thinking! "Stace, you don't have a baby!"

Can I get an Amen?

I thought the sword detail at our wedding was my initiation into the Marine Wives Club. As with most things about the Marine Corps, I was super wrong! My real initiation happened last month when I received a phone call from a dear friend at 2:30 am telling me she was in labor. I rushed to the hospital to stand in for her husband who was training across the country. Let me tell you... There is nothing as wonderful and terrifying as watching your friend push a person out of herself. I wanted to have 10 babies immediately and 0 babies ever... all at the same time. It was a very emotional time for everyone involved. Her husband made it to the hospital soon-ish after she had the baby and I booked it out of there.

Then I received a phone call from my mother this morning... My sister refuses to be outdone, you see. She had her baby this morning! And my brother-in-law got to catch the baby! Because they don't live with a doctor and didn't have time to go to the hospital.

My sister had her baby in her bathroom with  my nephews across the hall entertaining themselves and 911 on the phone. Talk about terrifying. I mean, I love my husband more than anything in the world, but I'm not sure I want him to even watch my give birth... Much less, be the one to catch the baby!

As is tradition when she out stories me, I will be buying her some Starbucks when I see her... She wins again!

How Friends and Family Members can Help Veterans Stay Healthy

I'm pretty excited to announce that I have my first guest writer on the blog! Emily Walsh is the Community Outreach Blogger for the Mesothelioma Cancer Alliance, and she has some interesting facts to share with us all! Everybody enjoy!

How Friends and Family Members can Help Veterans Stay Healthy
When a friend or family member leaves military service, many people think that they will adjust to civilian life easily. Too often, however, this is not the case. Veterans often suffer from difficulty in adjusting to civilian life, and this difficulty has been linked to severe health problems. Here are some of the ways in which friends and family members can help the veterans they care for adjust in a healthy manner.
Encourage Them To Be Honest About Mental Health Issues
People in general are reluctant to discuss mental health issues, and veterans who have faced combat are at a high risk of developing post-traumatic stress disorder. In addition, many veterans develop mental illnesses unrelated to their service, but their service helped keep their symptoms at bay. By talking with veterans in a nonjudgmental and open way, it may be possible to encourage them to seek help for any mental health issues from which they are suffering.
Honesty With Doctors
Many people are reluctant to disclose certain physical ailments to their doctors, it this lead to severe health issues down the road. Unfortunately, this leads many people who develop otherwise treatable cancers to die from their disease when a cure may have been possible. Veterans are in a higher risk of developing mesothelioma than the general population as asbestos was widely used in military applications in the past. Encouraging veterans to be open and honest with the doctors may help save their lives down the road.
Developing a Daily Routine
Military life depends on regimented activities, and people who have spent years in the military often have trouble adjusting to life without this structure. Friends and family members can play a valuable role in helping veterans develop a structured routine to help them enjoy life and remain healthy. Diet should be a part of this routine, and it may help to teach veterans about basic nutritional facts they may not have learned on the military. In addition, friends and family members can help veterans develop exercise routines to help them maintain their physical health and weight.

Today I Mowed the Lawn

My sister told me the other day that I'm not funny anymore. Ok, that's not an exact quote, but she did say that my blog is becoming less funny and more mushy. So, dear sister, this one's for you.

I sent this to a friend in a text today, so I'm pretty much going to copy and paste what I wrote to her.

Grass has been growing in patches in our yard for a couple months now. I drive into our neighborhood and all of the other houses look decent, then you see ours and it shouts at me, "Hey! You're the slacker of the neighborhood! MOW YOUR LAWN, lazy!" It hurts.

So today I decided to remedy that. Yes, it IS the middle of winter. However, it's 70 today, so it was officially time! I asked my husband to teach me how to start the riding mower, and he agreed. He took me outside and walked me through the steps, told me to get on and have fun.

I got on. I got nervous. I got off the riding lawn mower.

I decided he should go first... The day after he got his wisdom teeth taken out (Wife of the year award goes to.... Pretty much anyone but me. Not even a month in, and I'm already out of the running. Awesome). So he mows for a while then tells me it's my turn. Again... I got on. I got nervous. This time I stayed on, though. I put the mower on the slowest setting and it jerks forward. I swear I spent the first 30 seconds of my ride screaming. He spent the next 10 seconds screaming and running after me because the blower part was facing the cars. *No cars were damaged in the process, for the record.

But I did it!

We are no longer the white trash neighbors anymore! Our lawn is presentable.

I got off the mower and proudly strutted inside the house to show my husband all will be well when he abandons me leaves this summer.

His response: Maybe one day you will be able to mow in a straight line.

Thanks, husband.

Seriously. That just happened.

Vacuum Vs. Husband

 Our little family is suffering from this weird virus/disease/misery (clearly, we haven't been to the doctor because I have no idea what's going on. Whatever it is, I hate it). A couple days ago, I thought I was coming down with the flu. My entire body ached and I had chills. I slept off and on all afternoon. Nothing ever came of it, though. I was, more or less, fine the next day. Well, Jeff came home from work early yesterday with similar symptoms. His has held on longer, though, so he was home today, as well.

So I woke up late because I thought it was the weekend, and had a hard time adjusting pretty much since that moment. Jeff woke up a little after me and came downstairs to sit on the couch.

This is where I interject with the confession that I didn't do much housework this week because I received a sewing machine for Christmas, and have been playing with it every chance I get! I have done some cleaning, but whenever I'd get bored, I'd go play with my new toy.

I get bored easily.

Anyway, today was my catch up day and my floors looked pretty neglected. However, Jeff yelled at me for vacuuming downstairs while he was sick... I cried. Ok, that's a lie. He asked me to wait till tomorrow because the vacuum is super loud and doesn't help his headache, and I, like any wonderfully sacrificial wife, agreed to put off this chore one more day. Then I sent a friend a text message complaining about how he's throwing off my cleaning schedule (because the sewing machine clearly hadn't done that already)...

Then I realized something. As we approach the next deployment, I need to be enjoying my time with this man. I will be cleaning our house the entire time he's gone. That stupid vacuum will be my constant companion while he's gone.

But he's going.

So I put the vacuum in the corner of the room away, and I sat down with my husband and we watched tv and played games all day... Because that's more important.

I will have a clean house tomorrow. Today, I have my friend beside me, and that's good enough for me.

I Did It!

Today was a big day for me. You see, I got a haircut from someone new after going to the same person for about 4 years in VA. If you're a woman, you probably understand my earlier anxiety. If you're a man, you probably don't. You probably never will.

It took me 5 months to make the appointment. I was so nervous, I almost forgot my shoes when I left the house today. Seriously, I was outside in my socks.

So I put on my big girl panties and went to the hair salon. It wasn't terrible. It was actually pretty nice. They give head massages while they shampoo your hair, which helped my stress level.

Good news: I did it! And I'll go back to this hair dresses.

Bad news: she really likes to use volumizer. I try to avoid volumizer because I have too much hair as it is.

Conclusion: My hair would have done very well in the '80's...

Irony: I was bald for about half of my life in the '80's.