Oh, Jacksonville! pt 1.

I've decided to start a new segment on the blog. I'm calling it, "Oh, Jacksonville!" Here's why:

You see, we live in an interesting town. To be more accurate, we live by an interesting town. It's a military town for the most part... There are some Jacksonville natives, however. They're an interesting group, these folks. I'm devoting this segment to the people of Jacksonville-- both military and native. Keep an eye out! I'm sure they'll give me enough writing material. I already have 3 stories in mind.

Today, you get 1.

There's a man who lives here. They call him the Jacksonville ninja. Care to venture a guess why?

Because he stands on the corner (a specific corner) and practices his ninja skills (you need only watch a few seconds of the video to get the gist... unless you're into that sort of thing. Then, by all means, watch the entire thing). He apparently does this regularly. Often enough, at least, that you can google him and get some serious results. He's pretty famous around these parts.

On this same corner, a friend and I saw a man waving at people and riding a stationery bike... On top of a van... in a Santa hat.

Oh, Jacksonville!

The Waiting Game

I was talking to a friend last night, and we started discussing where we are in our lives. She's having a baby in January, and she and her husband are pretty excited about it! They're ready to meet him.

I've just begun the process of looking for a job, and am getting ready for my husband to come home TONIGHT!

It reminded me of a conversation I had with another friend (our wedding photographer) during my engagement. I had told her that if I had my way, Jeff and I would have eloped. I was tired of waiting to marry this man.

Then she told me something that changed my life. She told me that the waiting never ends. Our lives are designed in such a way that we're always waiting for something.

Waiting for a boyfriend
Waiting for him to propose
Waiting to marry him
Waiting for babies
Waiting for them to potty train
Waiting for retirement
Waiting for Jesus to return.

The word "wait" has such a negative connotation. No body likes to wait. We have bad attitudes about waiting (how many statuses did you read on Facebook about the voting lines people were in this past Tuesday? A lot). But I've come to realize that it's such a major part of our lives. We can either makes our lives miserable about the process of waiting, or we can use this time to do something! For your community, your church, your marriage, the Kingdom of God... The options are endless. It doesn't have to be a big project, but I firmly believe that we all need a purpose while we're waiting for the next season. If we put off doing something until we get what we're waiting for, we'll never do anything because we just start waiting for the next thing. It's a vicious cycle, really.

While I'm waiting for Jeff to come home, I can set up our house to make it feel like a home for us-- not just a place to live. While I'm waiting for a job, I can get involved in my church, or (dare I say it?) volunteer. I can use this time to mope around the house in my pajamas (like today...), or I can make a difference. Waiting shouldn't be our burden. Wasting our waiting time should be. So now it's your turn! What are you waiting for? And how are you waiting?

Name Change Fun

I've decided that it's officially time to change my name. Last week, I took a little trip to the Social Security office because you have to do that before you change your name on your driver's license. That was a piece of cake. Much easier than it should have been, really... It was awesome.

The next day, I went to the DMV to get my new license. I knew it probably wasn't going to be as easy as the previous day, but it had to be done.

Let me tell you about my trip to the DMV last week...

I drove 20 miles to get there in my husband's truck because it hadn't really been driven in over a month. I walked in, and handed all (and I do mean all) of my documents to the guy behind the desk. I didn't want to have to drive all the way home and back because I didn't have something I needed.

Like my proof of insurance.

You know, the one that was in my car... in the driveway... 20 miles away. My friend behind the desk decided I could just have my insurance company fax it to the DMV, so I called. After answering a series of questions verifying my identity and necessity of this proof of insurance, I was told that I could switch from my father's policy to my husband's quickly over the phone. The lady on the phone started the process before realizing that she's not certified in my new state, so she switched me over to her friend, Casey, who is certified here.

Meanwhile, I'm still hanging out at the DMV.

Casey proceeds to ask me the same series of questions I had just answered, and at this point, I'm a little antsy and ready to be done with this phone call and this trip to the DMV. I tell Casey, "Listen, if you can finish this quickly, I'd appreciate it. I really only called so you can fax my proof of insurance."

Casey responds with a grave, "oh. I can't do that for you. The primary policy holder needs to make that request." What I heard was, "Oh, you just wasted 5-10 minutes of your life." I was sufficiently annoyed.

My dad called and had it faxed. I went up to tell the DMV guy it was on its way, and he responds with a jovial, "Great! We'll have you take your test while it goes through."

That's right. A test. I didn't study for a test. Insert panic attack here.

The panic attack was a little dramatic (shocker, right? I'm not dramatic at all). It was the easiest test I've ever taken. I got all the questions right. It was kind of a joke.

So I go back to the desk and he enters all my information, and tells me that it'll be $32. I grab my debit card and hand it to him. He doesn't take it. He proceeds to inform me that credit and debit cards are not accepted at the DMV. He'll only take cash or check.

Hello, 1990's.

I seriously had to drive around town looking for a bank. I can't even get to Target without incident!

Anyway, I go into a store, buy my Halloween candy, and get $40 cash back. Then I go back to the DMV, give my new boyfriend his money (true story: he called me girlfriend the entire time I was there. Don't worry, he's old. It's not as creepy). He takes my picture (and tells me I'm beautiful, of course!), and I sign my new name on the little card.

Just kidding. I sign my maiden name on the card.

All that trouble, and I STILL don't have my license. It should be here any day now...

Driving to Target

There's something wrong with me. Seriously. I may be the most directionally challenged person you know (if you know me... If not, then the most directionally challenged person you should know). You know those people who can go somewhere once and remember years later how to get there? NOT me. I get lost an hour later when it's time to leave that place. It's terrible... But up until recently, it's been manageable.

Now I can't find my way to Target. Guys. It's literally one turn once you leave my neighborhood to Target. One turn. One. I can't handle it. The first couple times, it was funny. "Oh no! I turned too early!" "Oh no! This lane is a turn lane! I don't want to turn! Straight! I need to go straight!" I've lived here for about 2 and a half months, and I have yet to make it there without incident.

Until today. Today I made it all the way to Target by myself. I parked my car, patted myself on the back, and put my hand on the key to turn off the car when it hit me...

I didn't need to go to Target. I needed to go to Marshall's across the street. So I still haven't driven to Target without incident.

I'm hiring a chauffeur...

TMI-- Heads Up

Guys. I just had the worst experience of my life.

Ok, that may be a little dramatic. But you get the idea. Here's what happened:

You know Murphy's Law? That's the one that says "Anything that can go wrong will go wrong." I have heard several times that this law is particularly applicable when your Marine leaves for an extended period of time (specifically deployments, but really anytime he leaves). Awesome.

I was walking upstairs to go to bed when I saw a cockroach run into the bonus room. Hubby is GONE. Guess who has to kill him! GUESS!

 It's me. Crap.

So I ran into the other room to grab a tennis shoe and ran back to find him gone. Perfect. Cockroach loose in the house. Go team. So I began my search in the room. It took a minute. He was on the far wall. I needed him dead, so I did what any sane woman would do. I ran at him and threw my shoe at him with impeccable accuracy. Seriously, I couldn't throw that well again if I tried. I hit him, and he went down. Any other insect would have died on impact.

Stupid cockroaches never die.

He fell into a pile of speakers and wires and crap. I lost him in that dark, busy corner. Time to find a flashlight. I found one immediately. Naturally, it didn't work. Found another one. Doesn't work either, of course. Meanwhile, the cockroach was still alive in the bonus room. Time to head back and find him amidst the speakers and such... Don't worry. I found him back on the wall. Again... I ran at him with the shoe (because it worked so well last time, right?), but I learned my lesson. I kept my hand on the shoe this time and, again-- with impeccable accuracy-- pinned the cockroach against the wall. I started pounding the bug and screaming at it to "Come on! Just die already!!!!" to no avail. then I remembered I had my phone on me. I called my friend, Caits. That girl is up at crazy hours. Anytime I need to talk to her, she's awake. I can't tell you how many text conversations we've had at 2 am. She answered and I immediately started crying and asked her what to do. She calmed me down quite a bit and we hung up, but I still had the guy pinned to the wall, and couldn't leave because I didn't want to lose him again. I knew my great aim wasn't going to last. I had no idea what to do, so I just kept pounding the cockroach onto the wall and crying. Then my period started. Worst. Timing. Ever. I threw my left hand in the air (because the right was obviously holding the shoe against the wall) and screamed "You have GOT to be kidding me!!"

Then I got angry. "AHHHHH!" Bang, bang, bang, bang! (that's the sound of my shoe on the cockroach and wall)...

He died. He stuck to the wall so I could run and get toilet paper to flush him. I currently have bug body parts stuck to my wall. It'll need a good scrubbing tomorrow.

It was awful. Hubby needs to be home now. That's his job. I'll handle any bug other than cockroaches. Even spiders. I've killed a few of those since moving in. No problem. Bring it on.

I killed a cockroach and started my period at the same time. This is not okay.

The good news: He's dead.

The better news: I'm not pregnant (sorry, Moms).

Home Update and Missing My Man

Hubby left a couple weeks ago for training on the opposite coast. He won't be back for another few weeks, so I'm flying solo for a while. I have mixed emotions about this. I miss him, obviously... But I've been able to have the whole  bed to myself. I sleep in the middle now. Don't get me wrong, I'd rather have him next to me, but I'm taking advantage of a less-than-ideal situation.

I'm also working on fixing up the house. I finally unpacked all the boxes, and everything has a home! Since moving in, I've successfully hung curtains, put a bed together, hooked up a dvd player, and have done many other things that I didn't think I could do! Go team red!

AND I'm going to see him in a couple weeks! It'll be nice to break up this trip a little bit. :)

:/

I made a new friend yesterday! And by that, I mean, "The guy who changed my oil found my antics highly amusing as I tried to get the ants out of my car!"

Yes. Ants. In my car. My car was infested with ants. You know that kids game Ants in My Pants? It was like that... On crack. In my car. Minus the crack. It was a nightmare. They had set up camp in the cracks in my car. Between the roof and windshield, in the doors, lining the dashboard, in the console... They were still hanging out this morning. This is NOT okay. We're setting off a bug bomb this weekend. That's gotta be healthy, right? :/

They've got to go.