Thursday, April 21, 2011

Who Is This Child??

I bought lunch at work today, and it came with chips. I wasn't too hungry, so I threw the chips in my purse for later and forgot about them...

My family went out to dinner tonight, and I sat beside my nephew. After we were done eating, he looked in my purse and found my chips. He pulled them out of the bag and gave a very emphatic "wow!" Our conversation went as follows:

Kiddo: We need to share.

Me: Those are my chips.

Kiddo: We need to share with Mommy.

Me: We need to put those back in my purse.

Kiddo: We need to share with Daddy.

Me: Those are my chips!

Kiddo: We need to share with Papa.

Me: Give me my chips!

Kiddo: They're MY chips!

Me: No, they're MY chips! May I please have my chips back?

Kiddo: Well....... I'll just hold them here in my arm pit!!

*Places bag of cheese puffs in his armpit!

He also licked the table in the restaurant.

I love him.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Hats and Insects

My school had standardized testing this past week. This means that I had to keep my class quiet and focused for about 3.5 hours straight every day. Seriously. We finished tests on Thursday, so we had a very relaxed day on Friday. So easy that they all decided to make Friday hats. I got one, too. Here it is:

Why, yes. I DID wear this hat all morning.

In my History class, we found this:

It wouldn't have been such a problem if I had been the one to find it... However, my students found it. I swear, it was like the parting of the Red Sea-- part II. After a second, though, there was an ambush to get a closer look. In the middle of class! It was impossible to get anyone to focus on the first place because they had been testing all week already, so we didn't get a thing accomplished after that. We had a debate about whether it was a boy or girl, so we named it Cory (because apparently that's a gender neutral name). I set him free after school. Go team.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011


I have 4 different stories I could tell you about today, but instead of boring you with all of them, I'm going to share my favorite. As he was "working" on his homework, I noticed that Mike* was chewing gum.

  • Me: "Mike. Go spit out your gum, please."

  • Mike: Gets up and walks to the trash can to spit out his gum. A few minutes later, I notice that there is still gum in his mouth...

  • Me: "Mike... I have already told you to spit out that gum! Why is it still in your mouth?"

  • Mike: *Cough. "Miss C. The gum isn't in my mouth."

  • Me: "Okay. Then throw away the gum that's now in your hand."

  • Mike: "Miss C. There's no gum in my hands." *Shows me empty hands

  • Me: "Mike, where is the gum?"

  • Mike: *Gives guilty grin and holds up a pen with a wad of gum attached to it.

  • Jared*: "Um... Mike, you can keep that pen. I don't want it back."
Why, yes, the pen did belong to another student. *Names have been changed.

Friday, April 1, 2011

Update on the "Plague"

Remember that time when I was like, "I feel pretty good. It's the most mild cold I've ever had!" Yeah. That was crap. I went to the doctor for the first time in a long time on Tuesday. That's how sick I was feeling. And she looked at my sinuses and listened to my chest... Her response was "Yeah... You have a sinus infection, and it's spread to your chest. I'm putting you on an antibiotic." So now I'm feeling a lot better. However, I feel really stupid because I thought I was feeling so well. P.S. I have gone to work all week this week, despite all of my infections. You know that kid who goes to school every day, even when they need to stay in bed and rest? I'm that kid. And I'm not even a kid!